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SoundsXP Message Boards - Indie, Indiepop, Nu-Folk and Alt-Country Forums • View topic - Old classics wrecked by Hollywood

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 28, 2012 6:24 pm 
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Location: Wild and devil-may-care on the last mobility scooter to hell... YEAH!!!!


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2012 6:23 pm 
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Porridge

Robin Williams gets to use his full range of ad-libs, funny voices and mugs to camera as Norman Fletcher, an old prison lag who takes young naive first timer Lennie Godber (Justin Beiber) under his wing as they try to get the upper hand over prison wardens Mr Mackay (Sylvester Stallone) and Mrs Barrowclough (Lisa Kudrow). Madonna directs.

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Curmudgeonly Rock 'n' Roll time traveller from ye olden days

2nd verse same as the 1st...


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2012 6:40 pm 
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One for the older ones among you all.

High tech, high octane thrills and an equally high body count in Michael Bay's Pogle's Wood update Revenge Of The Pipe Cleaner Family

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Curmudgeonly Rock 'n' Roll time traveller from ye olden days

2nd verse same as the 1st...


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2012 6:40 pm 
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Some Mom's Do 'Ave 'Em

Following the capers of LA resident Frank Swartzwelder as his hapless mistakes cause havoc in the IT systems of Silicone Valley, much to the embarrassment of his long suffering wife Barbara Ann who finally divorces Frank after he crashes through the window of Randy's Donuts whilst roller blading. She subsequently receives ownership of their Beverly Hills pad with swimming pool thanks to a prenuptial agreement.

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REVOLUTION PURITY LOVE SUICIDE ACCURACY

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2012 6:54 pm 
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Fella in codpiece with curly mullet
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Location: Only 3 miles from space
The Johnny B Goode Life

Millionaire rockstar Johnny decides, on the advice of his Scientology lifestyle guru, to quit his life of groupies, hedonism and Grammy awards to buy a 3000 acre ranch in Arizona where he and his third wife Mary Jane aim to live self-sufficiently, using only their huge bank balance and a team of hired helpers to transform the land into a Graceland style theme park. Much to the disgust of neighbouring oil magnates Margo and Jerry (played by Joan Collins and Dirk Benedict). Things don't go according to plan as Johnny becomes addicted to prescription painkillers and fritters away the family fortune following a coke-fueld gambling rampage after discharging himself from the Betty Ford Clinic.

The story is later made in to a feature length movie starring Lindsey Lohan and Eminem.

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REVOLUTION PURITY LOVE SUICIDE ACCURACY

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 30, 2012 10:31 am 
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cRaZy cat with the bongos
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London's Burning

Chuck Norris leads a crew of maverick Firefighters in the small town of London (Kimble County, Texas) and protects the community from the dangers of deep-fat fryers, faulty smoke alarms, and homosexuality.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 30, 2012 3:08 pm 
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Location: Wild and devil-may-care on the last mobility scooter to hell... YEAH!!!!
Bagpuss

Jack Black plays the saggy cloth cat. In this feature length film version Bagpuss learns to play the guitar and generally goofs around while covering Led Zep and Deep Purple numbers. Also features Robert De Niro as Professor Yaffle.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 30, 2012 3:28 pm 
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Location: Only 3 miles from space
Button Moon

Whist attempting to dock with the international space station, Mr Spoon (played by Jean Claude van Damme) finds his shuttle hit by a radio interference beam knocking out all the electronics on board. The missile was a revenge attack by the North Korean leader (played by Danny Devito) in protest at Americans removing both the words 'North' and 'Korean' from the English language. Help is at hand when America's returning mission to set up a permanent land base on the Moon (constructed entirely of recycled buttons originally manufactured in far eastern sweat shops from the blood and tears of Taiwanese orphans) takes a detour to rescue the crew shortly before they run out of oxygen. The heroine of the piece is commander Sue-Ellen Kennedy (played by Whoopi Goldberg), the first black, wheelchair-bound lesbian woman in space. None of the footage of the daring rescue is shown on US TV as it clashes with the Super Bowl.

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