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Following on from the great lyrics thread... have you ever found seemingly innocuous song lyrics to be a bit odd or creepy? I mean Cliff Richard singing about going on a Summer Holiday with a busload of young boys is an obvious one but...

I was listening to 'I Drove All Night' by Roy Orbison yesterday and felt a bit odd. A nice slice of polite adult contemporary music:

"I drove all night to get to you.
Is that alright?"

Why of course it is Roy. Of course. If you're not too tired after the drive obviously. He goes on:

"I drove all night.
I crept in your room
Woke you from your sleep
And made love to you.
Is that alright?"

WHAT? First of all the use of the word "crept". Who on earth would want Roy Orbison creeping (presumably uninvited) into their room? While they're ASLEEP? Secondly, waking someone up and instantly making love to them is a bit odd. Especially after an 8 hour drive. Especially if you'd JUST crept up on them. Thirdly, he asks "IS THAT ALRIGHT???" again. So he's crept into this chick's room, woke her up and 'made love' to her WITHOUT HER KNOWING. I mean normally you go:

"Oh by the way I borrowed your car last night to run to the shop and back... is that alright?"

...and that's fine. Rather than

"Oh by the way I drove all the way to your house last night, crept into your room, woke you up and made love to you... is that alright?"

Coming from a 55 year old man wearing a black suit and sunglasses? Now that made me feel hugely creeped out.

Anyone else got any instances of when polite popstars that your Mum will happily tap her foot along to go a bit wrong?

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In work not working

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Alas, not actually Gryff Rhys Jones...

"Little Jack Horner sitting on the corner
With no shoes and clothes
This aint funny, but he took his money
And sniffed it up his nose"

Keeping in line with previous comments, this number one hit for Gary Puckett & The Union Gap doesn't seem to get the saturation airplay that it once did.

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl
You're much too young, girl

With all the charms of a woman
You've kept the secret of your youth
You led me to believe you're old enough
To give me love
And now it hurts to know the truth, woah

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl
You're much too young, girl

Beneath your perfume and make-up
You're just a baby in disguise
And though you know that it's wrong to be
Alone with me
That come on look is in your eyes, woah

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl
You're much too young, girl

So hurry home to your mama
I'm sure she wonders where you are
Get out of here, before I have the time
To change my mind
'Cause I'm afraid we'll go too far, woah

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl
You're much too young, girl

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl
You're much too young, girl

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Curmudgeonly Rock 'n' Roll time traveller from ye olden days

2nd verse same as the 1st...

Man With Money by The Everly Brothers.
These lyrics wouldn't seem at all strange or unexpected from, say, David Allan Coe, but Don & Phil committing a robbery in order to win the girl doesn't seem quite right.

She wants a man with lots of money, and I'm a poor boy
He buys her things, she calls him honey, she calls me poor boy
What good does it do to give her love good and true?
When any fool would understand
She thinks money makes a man

She wants a man with lots of money, and I'm a poor boy
She wants the things you buy with money and not a poor boy

Man with money
Man with money
Man with money

Just down the street, I know a place
When they're asleep, I'll cover my face
I'll break the lock, open the door
I'll slip inside, I'll rob the store

Then I'll be a man with lots of money and not a poor boy
I'll buy her things, she'll call me honey and not a poor boy

Man with money
Man with money
Man with money
Man with money
Man with money

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Curmudgeonly Rock 'n' Roll time traveller from ye olden days

2nd verse same as the 1st...

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Curmudgeonly Rock 'n' Roll time traveller from ye olden days

2nd verse same as the 1st...

It's difficult to refrain from simply posting 'risque' lyrics, as opposed to genuinely weird lyrics. A lot of the time, the weirdest stuff is in plain view. For what it's worth I think these are genuinely odd lyrics...

He took his sister from his head and he painted her on the sheets, and he rolled her up in grass and trees, and they kissed 'til they were dead... Pixies

"My loneliness is killing me, and I must confess - I still believe. When I'm not with you I lose my mind. Give me a sign. Hit me, baby, one more time" Britney Spears

" 'Father', 'yes, Son?', 'I want to kill you'. 'Mother, I want to fuck you'." The Doors

"And if you kill yourself, you will make him happy. He'll keep you in a jar, and you'll think you're happy. He'll give you breathing holes, and you'll think you're happy. He'll cover you in grass, and you'll think you're happy. You're in a laundry room, your clue just came to you..." Nirvana


"Me and the Devil was walking side by side. And now I'm gonna beat my woman 'til I get satisfied". Robert Johnson

On a side note, weirdly, Klaxons lyrics are ALWAYS very odd. All of their songs (bar the covers) are occult orientated, and seemingly in an occult-educated vein. Their lyric writer is certainly HIGHLY versed in Ancient mythology, Crowley, Enochian magic, and left hand path occultism.

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Crazy haired surfin' slacker

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Johnny Mandel's 'Suicide is Painless' is bonkers. Lack of pain is a subjective experience that the suicide isn't likely to be able to report. And the only change is brings is obvious! I'm not sure that the only way to win is cheat, unless you're Christiano Ronaldo, and I really think the "brave man" deserved a better reply. Clearly Johnny Mandel was a bit grumpy when he wrote this load of bollocks:

(PS don't read this lyric if you're from Essex and feel a bit disgruntled:)

Through early morning fog I see
visions of the things to be
the pains that are withheld for me
I realize and I can see...

[chorus]:

That suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.

I try to find a way to make
all our little joys relate
without that ever-present hate
but now I know that it's too late, and...

[Chorus]

The game of life is hard to play
I'm gonna lose it anyway
The losing card I'll someday lay
so this is all I have to say.

[Chorus]

The only way to win is cheat
And lay it down before I'm beat
and to another give my seat
for that's the only painless feat.

[Chorus]

MASH
The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger...watch it grin, but...

[Chorus]

A brave man once requested me
to answer questions that are key
'is it to be or not to be'
and I replied 'oh why ask me?'

'Cause suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.
...and you can do the same thing if you choose.

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Alas, not actually Gryff Rhys Jones...

"Little Jack Horner sitting on the corner
With no shoes and clothes
This aint funny, but he took his money
And sniffed it up his nose"

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In work not working