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who suddenly discovered the cause of his problem was an old cotton bud that had been in ... how did successive doctors not spot that? Mind you my sister had a really smelly face for a while as a 3 year old until a rotting rolled up piece of paper fell out of her nostril one day.

Any more? Westie must have had some appalling medical condition like intense headaches and nausea that was actually caused by snorting Uhu for 18 years... or summat?

I had a cotton bud in my ear but I knew it was there! as when I pulled the stick out it was minus its fluffy cloud. I was taken to the doctor and after some umming and aaring she then squeezed it out, unfortunately bursting my eardrum with it. I then had to go to a nose/ear/throat specialist who proceeded to burst my other eardrum, by accident, while examining the wrong ear - dr's ey? Who'd have 'em.
I guess my 'hidden' object is the long needle in my arse which remains to this day. They don't know how it got there and after hours of surgery they've concluded that it will have to stay there.

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Jarvis Cocker or David Bowie or AVB or Johnny Borrell, she isn't picky

Cavey Cocker, Cup Cake Queen, Saint Thomas.

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Looks like Elijah Wood. Supports Liverpool. Likes Coldplay.

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If Ian Curtis had lived, and enjoyed the ale…

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"I had always suspected Jerome had stuck something in his ear when he was little and that was causing the problem."

Didn't bleedin' do much about it though, did he?

At least it wasn't as bad as that story about the American kid who had a spider living in his ear.. *shudder*.

Ears are the only self-cleaning organ of the body, so you're not meant to use anything to clean them. Or something.